Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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