Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
