I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
