on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
I think I sprained my soul last night
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Randomize
