I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
