To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize
