Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
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