I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
I think my nap took me to another dimension
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
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