When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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