who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
