i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
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