ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
