It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Randomize
