its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
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