Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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