Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
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