garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
Randomize
