There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
Randomize
