if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
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