I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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