The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
