you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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