After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
