I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
