I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
Randomize