Dual....:-)
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
