I think I died a long time ago.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
