There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Randomize
