it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
So vagazzling was a success
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
