I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
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