if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Randomize
