I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
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