You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
