so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
She's the barista slut.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Randomize
