I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Randomize
