i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
there was a trapeze. enough said
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
Randomize
