can we get nightvision for the apartment?
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
Rumble strips road head = magical
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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