You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Randomize
