I'd wear matching sweaters with you
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Randomize
