so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
Randomize
