This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
You don't make any sense
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