does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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