shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Me too!
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Randomize
