Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
So much Jack, so little girl.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
Randomize
