i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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