The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Randomize