just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
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