I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Randomize
