Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Randomize
