We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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